Self-care has transitioned from a buzzword to a way of life for many people. While we know caring for ourselves is important, it can be challenging to establish and commit to practices that help us live better. Life gets busy. Work gets hectic. The people in our lives lean on us. Our needs often end up coming in last on our list of priorities.
One thing that may help is remembering that self-care doesn’t have to be formulaic, and the practices you choose should align with your personal needs. The goal is to improve your mental and physical health, which looks different for each individual.
Before jumping into self-care practices, there’s an important step to take–identifying your needs and establishing some goals based on those requirements.
“Self-care looks different for everyone based on stages in life, challenges, stressors, and priorities,” says Ruth Olumba, DO, MPH, FACOG, a triple board-certified cosmetic surgeon and gynecologist in Plano, Texas, whose work centers on wellness. “Clarifying your goals helps narrow down which self-care methods to explore,” she adds.
Common goals may be to get a handle on your anxiety, address the trauma that’s holding you back, improve your physical health, or find emotional balance. Once you’ve established your needs, be real about how much time you have to dedicate to self-care practices, as this can impact consistency. For example, establishing a goal of working out for an hour five days a week may not be realistic if you work a full day and have young children.
Finally, experiment with different practices and pay attention to the impact each has on your mental and physical well-being, says Bev Wittenberg, a licensed social worker in New Jersey.
“Practices that leave you feeling calmer, more centered, or more connected over time are likely beneficial,” she says.
Practice Mindful Consumption
A 2024 report by DataReportal found adults between the ages of 16 and 64 spent almost seven hours a day online. That’s almost 17 years of one’s adult life online, scrolling and consuming other people’s thoughts. Long bouts of screen time have also been associated with higher rates of mental health disorders in adults and children.
Since the overconsumption of digital media can negatively impact your well-being, a good self-care practice is to be more mindful about what and how you consume.
“In a world where digital media can be overwhelming, practicing mindful consumption involves setting intentional limits on screen time and curating digital spaces to prioritize uplifting and educational content,” Wittenberg says.
She provides the example of creating time blocks for social media and email use. What you consume matters too–consider unfollowing accounts that are stress or anxiety-inducing. If you need help, use apps like RescueTime, Freedom, or Brick to help limit screen time.
“Pairing this with ‘digital detox’ periods like screen-free Sundays can create mental clarity and foster meaningful offline connections,” she says.
Cultivate Moments of Joy
A major contributor to our well-being is experiencing unfiltered joy. While it is normal to experience ebbs and flows characterized by a range of emotions, remember that joy can be found in anything. Compile a list of things that bring you joy–include both big and small things on your list. This can be a valuable tool to use on a daily basis to help you stay grounded, especially during difficult moments. You may also set a goal of acknowledging or doing one joyful thing a day and then journaling about it.
Regular Movement
This isn’t a surprising tip–by now, many of us know that moving our bodies can have a positive impact on our mental well-being.
“Daily activities that move your body will help lower stress, boost energy, and support a healthy body image,” says Olumba.
That said, knowing something is good for us doesn’t always make it easier to do. Start with low-hanging fruit, like setting a goal to stand and stretch a few times a day and work your way up to other forms of physical activity. Examples include walking, yoga, dance, bike riding, skating, or pilates. While you may feel pressure to start big, try and prioritize consistency over intensity, especially if you’re not the most active person.
It can also be helpful to move with other people, Olumba shares.
“There are added benefits if you find a class, club or community that hosts these activities,” she says. “This can help build or expand your network, offering emotional validation and support.”
Building and Maintaining Community
Social connection has long proven to have positive effects on our well-being as humans. However, many factors can make community feel inaccessible to some, such as capitalism, trauma, and even mental health challenges.
Make an effort to build and maintain a community as a self-care practice, as it can help provide a sense of belonging, purpose, and support, says Wittenberg.
If you aren’t sure where to start when it comes to community building, try engaging in hobbies that connect you to like-minded people, such as book clubs, fitness classes, faith-based organizations, or volunteering. Facebook groups can also be a goldmine, be it a mom group for parents or one focused on new friendships.
“The key is to balance self-care with relational care, which research shows is crucial for mental health,” Wittenberg adds.
Setting Healthy Boundaries
It is challenging to care for yourself when you keep engaging with people or behaviors that are counterproductive to your well-being. This is where setting boundaries can be helpful.
“Healthy boundaries are a form of self-preservation that can help keep us safe and well mentally, spiritually, and physically,” Daphne Fuller, a somatic therapist and director of Therapeutic Solutions and Wellness in Fayetteville, North Carolina, says.
“I’m not sure if this is something that many people think of when we look at self-care,” she says.
To practice healthy boundaries, identify situations that leave you feeling drained and where you find using your voice is challenging, says Fuller. You can then map out some healthy boundaries that prevent this from happening and implement strategies that will help you enforce said boundaries. Self-care is also key here. It’s normal to feel bad after setting boundaries, so ensure you take care of yourself after.
Also, remember that you may need to set healthy boundaries with yourself in addition to others. Examples include boundaries around sleep, technology, spending, and even your thoughts.
