Each person who identifies as a women or a femme might recall moments with their family when they were perhaps explicitly told their duties: to marry and to have children. Looking back, those declarations might have been mere whispers or public declarations. Regardless of the approach, as a young girl, I grew up excited to one day become a wife and mother with children. My mother recalls how, when I was roughly five years old, I declared my dream was to be “just like her.” Though that was many moons ago, I can’t seem to get that phrase out of my head–largely because she made it look so cool. Whichever era it was, the 1990s or the 2000s, and even now, my mom, a New Yorker by birth, Long Island to be exact, was always the flyest and the person with the sunniest disposition in every room she entered. Shift dresses, high-shouldered blazer skirt suits, and high-heeled pumps were her go-tos. On top of that, she was a social worker by trade and a community activist who was tied intrinsically to the city she chose to move to, Orlando.
At the time, there appeared to be no guidebook for my mom and the other women who were raising children inside marriages or as single moms. Now, due to the shifting cultural lexicon, women like “Cool Moms” podcast host Elise Peterson, The Cut’s “Brooding” columnist Kathryn Jezer-Morton, and the platform Spread The Jelly, many of us aspirational mothers who love fashion and consider ourselves creative can look to each of these platforms as sources of positive inspiration.
Aside from the attributions I’m pinning onto Peterson and Jezer-Morton, some mothers are showcasing their lives in unique manners on social media. An individual who sticks out is content creator and multi-hyphenate, Telsha Anderson-Boone. Though she formerly lived on the East Coast, now in California, and it’s always a treat to see her Instagram posts featuring her growing family alongside her husband, Justin. The joy evoked from many of the images she shares feels like the furthest thing from forced.
Additionally, the fact that her style has continued to titter between minimalism and experimental has me hooked too. If like myself, you’re worried about mothering taking over your wardrobe, Anderson-Boone, who has a background in social media and owns T.A, is proving daily that one doesn’t need to be fearful of negative connotations when it comes to self-styling. Her looks are ever-inspiring and I must admit they urge me to continue developing my style in the years to come.
Launched by Peterson, an artist, educator, and storyteller, in 2018, “Cool Moms” is more than a safe space for moms. It’s a podcast that has featured guests that speak to what it’s like being millennial mothers–live events have also ensued due to the show’s community. To be frank, so much has changed between our mother’s generation and the 2020s. So, it’s such a relief that a podcast was created to explore the varying experiences that mothers of this day and age go through. Anderson-Boone, actress Tika Sumpter, and Akelah Releford are past guests of the platform. Getting to engage even digitally with poignant conversations between mothers of color and fellow creatives is pivotal to me–it urges me to continue down the path I’m on. It also gives me a guiding light of sorts.
Author, mother, and writer Kathryn Jezer-Morton regularly digs into topics that might feel unapproachable for those who aren’t chronically online. One of my favorite pieces I recall reading for her “Brooding” column was “Is an Overcrowded House Such A Terrible Thing?” In it, she delved into the ideals behind staying with family during Christmastime. The joys of being crowded with family amid the holidays immediately made me think back to how, during this season, I treck to my grandparents’ home in Long Island. At times, nearly five to eight guests can also fit there semi-comfortably. Some qualms come with this, of course. But Jezer Morton’s realistic approach to this topic presents how enjoyable it can be too–the close-knit feeling of being with family at least yearly in a “family” home versus a rental is also explored. The consensus, lodging with family is largely fun, especially because you’ll walk away with memories you’ll hold close to you for decades to come.
The article “Why Are Parents On TikTok So Angry” broke down conversations that were happening online and IRL. The hoopla behind “gentle parenting” and commodification of parenting was explained in laymen’s terms by Jezer-Morton brilliantly. Parenting-advice content on social media was also touched on in a way that felt approachable. Kathryn is particularly skilled at bringing topics down to earth–this is why I continue reading her column.
Differently, Spread The Jelly is a platform I came across on Instagram this year. On the digital site, those who daydream about mothering can get lost in intentional content. One story I read recently featured South Asian Stella Simona. This piece grapples with homeschooling, instilling autonomy into her children, and more. Many of her quotes felt poignant–many of them also felt like a necessary revelation to me: Motherhood is attainable on your own terms with the right village.
This story is one of many that showcase the perplexities that encompass being a mother and a human raising other humans, which is not a small task. Alongside interesting and expertly shot imagery, Spread The Jelly has pushed itself as a space to be spoken to in a manner that I’d coin as approachable as well. (Fellow creatives Vashtie, Anderson-Boone, and Phoebe Lovatt have been featured on the platform).
Though I’ve shared a few of my sources of inspiration that I look to for maternal inspiration, I urge you to get familiar with these and others that feel good to you. The ones I have been earnestly paying attention to lately are noteworthy. To me, they are notable because they offer a chance for me to do the opposite of assimilating into what the wider Western culture is always pushing: follow past generations and you’ll be fine. With the assistance of these platforms and the “Brooding” column, I am often left energized. My hope is that you’ll also look to them as guiding lights too.
